Well this is my first attempt at doing this...but my brain is always full of such garbage that I think I will use this as my cerebral trash can. If that's too deep for you to start with, then I suggest you go watch the Muppets or something. Naw thats harsh, I love the Muppets...especially the chef guy who has a very obvious speech impediment (Swedish...rrrriiiight.) and learning disability. Everyone loves a life underdog.
Anyways, I think I am going to use this space to rant mostly about sports but sometimes maybe I'll delve into other subjects affecting my life. Stuff like fine cuisine, memorable Vikings boat cruises, and why aardvarks are highly undervalued as pets.
Here goes...some random thoughts on our 2007 summer trip to the South Pacific:
1) You get to see the ballparks when you fly into San Fran. If its clear you will see the parks in Frisco and across the bay in Oakland. Very nice. Unfortunately the airport is in South San Francisco. They have a sign on a hill (think the Hollywood sign but with an aura of overwhelming sadness) that reads "South San Francisco: The Industrial City". I think they need to change it to "South San Fran: Yikes!" The mall felt like a bad rap video and I bought some shoes out of necessity...or was it fear?
2) The Pacific Ocean is big. I think Mario was onto something with that warp pipe idea. I would have liked to actually just jumped down a pipe and emerged in New Zealand. Probably wouldn't even minded dodging a few goombas and that frickin' cloud thing that tossed the spiky red things. I was feeling fairly good after the 3 hour flight to San Francisco but after the next 12.5 hour leg to Auckland, New Zealand the peachy feeling had gone a little.
3) Sarcastic kudos to New Zealand immigration for having a giant"biosecurity" campaign. Basically, if they find any evidence that you are trying to bring anything organic into their country you are going to the gallows. Of course, we were smart enough to see the signage warning of our impending doom...by we I mean everyone except my sister who managed to sneak a wheat bag through 3 levels of immigration before being busted by the final x-ray machine. Code Red! Lucky for her, she looks as much as a bio-terrorist as Janet Reno looked like a potential Playboy centrefold. (ps. if you don't know Reno...google it, er...her)) A big Pacific Islander border guard told her he could bake the wheat seeds until the bag was deemed sterile and she could retrieve it in 48 hours (seriously!) or she could hand it over for good. So needless to say it was "buenos noches wheatbag". Our first Kiwi experience. I really wonder how many wheat seeds have been convicted of crimes in New Zealand. Did these laws come in because some clover once got in and went on a spree? How screwed are you if you are caught bringing rapeseed into the country? Biosecurity: Good idea, but maybe a little much?
4) As a sports fan I was excited for a new sporting realm to uncover. And uncover I did. A couple facts about the sports down here:
a. New Zealand and Australia seem to only ever compete against each other! In three weeks in the southern hemisphere I watched them compete against each other in rugby, cricket, netball (don't even ask), and lawn bowls (which is eerily like curling without sweeping or excitement).
b. We went to Eden Park in Auckland which is the New Zealand national rugby stadium which was pretty neat. With that I figure I have been to some pretty obscure stadiums in my day including this one and the national soccer stadium of Hungary. I need a life.
c. All the aforementioned sports are about as fun as being tossed off a skyscraper with a bus tied around your neck. Youtube some netball and ask yourselves why this game is entertaining? It's like basketball except you cannot contest a shot in the scoring area. There was some girl on Australia who was like 6'3" and was something like 24-26 shooting on the night. All her shots were from about 3 feet out with nobody allowed to touch her. It was kind of like hunting...if you went into the woods, and the deer voluntarily tied themselves to a tree spread-eagle, and you got to walk up to within 3 feet and oh ya...you got to use a freakin' cannon!! Seriously, who thought of this? So, Mrs Catherine Cox (the woman in question) I hope you know that every time I saw you reach out on your tippy toes to make a magical 3 footer, every ounce of me was hoping that Ben Wallace would jump out from behind the hoop and swat your poor excuse of shot off a rafter in row ZZ.
d. Australian Rules football has some merit. Quite entertaining actually. I had my hopes up. And then I turned the channel and there was yachting to bring me back to reality. Gag.
5) Auckland has a pretty cool zoo. Good bang for your buck. Krysta got to feed a giraffe which was a top 5 moment in her life and at least top 225 for me in our years together. For a while it looked like the giraffe was going to snub her and it walked away. She barely kept a stiff lip. And then the magic of nature. The giraffe came back! Maybe it sensed Krysta's sadness. (Maybe it was the zookeeper's reload of giraffe food). But it came back. And Krysta and a bunch of grade 2 kids had their moment of bliss. Oh and if you are ever there take a moment to read the sign outside the nocturnal Kiwi bird exhibit. Krysta didn't and we got an angry lecture in the dark for about 5 minutes in front of the Kiwi. But we got our pic so that lady can go and ........
6) Whether you hit a NZ beach in Piha, Shakespear Regional Park, Mt. Manganui or many of the other places where ocean hits land it just feels good. We saw some pretty angry oceans and some big waves and no matter what it still looks pretty. You know the line in that cheeseball country song that says "I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean..." Something is wrong with you if you don't. If you ever get so full of yourself that your head barely fits on your shoulders...maybe this experience is for you. If it doesn't humble you, not sure what on this Earth will. And if you after being there you do not think that God has not had a hand in this world, well then maybe you need to stand on that beach a minute or two longer.
I think that unloads my mind on New Zealand. Just some random thoughts that I thought I should toss out there. Maybe I overdid it for a first post but I feel lighter. I have enjoyed reading the thoughts of some of my other friends in blog form and thought maybe I had some interesting stories to share. Hope it was a worthwhile read. If not, I'll keep trying. I mean doesn't everyone want to be the Barry Bonds of blogging?
